Thursday, January 3, 2013

cooking failure and later unrelated success

looks pretty interesting no?  orange zest vanilla bean sugar.  for "creamsicle orange curd".  like lemon curd/pudding.  only...

most miserable cooking/baking failure yet.  not only did the butter actually curdle, i wasted an entire vanilla bean, the time it took me to zest and juice 4 huge oranges, too many eggs to count, and about an hour.  apparently part of the directions that i failed to read [or pre-google] since this never happened the last 4 times i made lemon/lime curd... was DO NOT BOIL THE BUTTER.  IT WILL BE A MISERABLE CHUNKY LUMPY COMPLETE AND UTTER FREAKIN FAILURE.

but im over it.  really.
cos orange rum balls.  and mint chocolate vodka balls.  my recipe calls for 9 oz of cookies but the orange and mint cookies i had were 5 oz packages.  oh math.  the absolute bane of engineers.  or..atleast some of us.  regardless, i figured out my ratios and bob's your uncle, i had booze balls.  for my nye party and for the office.  
some andes mint chip bark as a variation of this recipe
the ingredients for toffee bark not pictured as it was delicious and ...about an inch thick.  i clearly missed the implied step where it said to spread the layers out quite thin.  i ended up using a very sharp butcher knife to hack out bite sized pieces.  instead of quarter pound hunks.
aaaaand meatballs!  so many meatballs.  and all kind of cube-shaped.  my approximate recipe which happily fed 16 people [minus one vegetarian..]:
  • 3 pounds 90/10 ground beef
  • 3 eggs
  • ~2 cups panko [or mixed chipotle panko]
  • 2 T oregano
  • 2 T salt
whisk eggs until frothy, add other stuff.  form into balls - i used a 1 1/2 T cookie scoop.  that i then soaked in boiling water.  painstakingly brown each meatball on all sides.  bake at 350 for 10 minutes.  dump into crock pot and top with sauce [mix all ingredients together.  done]
  • 2 C ketchup
  • 1/2 C balsamic vinegar
  • 1/2 C brown sugar
  • 1/4 C rice wine vinegar
  • 1/4 C sriracha
  • 2 T red pepper flakes
  • 2 thinly sliced caramelized shallots
  • 4 diced chipotles in adobo
  • 4 T adobo
heat in crock pot 3 hours on low.  serve.  warn everyone about lava-temperature meatballs.  expect sad moans of pain mixed with squeals of delight.  cool firey mouths with beverages and repeat process.

4 comments:

  1. I almost forgot the eggs in the cake I made. So I whisked them into the pans...LOL. Oh man. You're an engineer? o_o

    ReplyDelete
  2. i try and make light of my baking disasters but sometimes they make me want to destroy my kitchen.. i guess i used to be an engineer, but i cant find a job where i want to be so i'm a credit analyst now...

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm terrible at cooking/baking. I always burn everything! My husband is the cook in our house - I just do the prepwork :D

    ReplyDelete
  4. it just takes practice! and ...not drinking while you cook. trust me, that leads to distraction and then things burn/curdle/catch fire.

    ReplyDelete

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