Monday, March 23, 2009

violent movies

lately i have renewed my adoration of brainless action movies. and apparently one word titles are all the rage. here are the cinematographic masterpieces i have seen recently, each with a twitteresque synopsis.

girl gets kidnapped and sold into prostitution while vacationing with dumbass friend, father kicks literal arse

boy likes girl, boy gets car, car turns into crazy space robot, car saves boy, boy saves world, world goes on not caring or noticing, surprisingly best movie of 2007?

in bruges:
two hitmen await orders in bruges after massive fuckup, bloodshed and tourism ensue, belgians don't seem to notice

big blue penis disconnects from humanity, humanity tries to recover, bombs "cleanse" humanity, world keeps on turning

fraternity of weavers translates binary into targets/hits, boy duped into killing father, has "luke i am your father moment", kills lots, moves on

the international:
bank finances murder and treachery, heroes temporarily save world, normalcy returns, new bank finances murder and treachery

crazy future people gain weird talents, fight for their lives, soy sauce is injected to a really sweet soundtrack in attempt to save the plot

max payne:
detective searches for family's killer, takes crazy valkerie drug, goes on killing spree with mila kunis in 4" heels, has 2 near death experiences

the theme seems to be death/revenge, saving mankind, or generally wearing as little clothing as possible.


  1. My sister can't stand that my favourite films in the world and the ones I most like seeing are desperately violent, and usually depressing and political on the side. But they don't always have to be brainless - The Godfather is always my number one, and the Die Hard films aren't bad...

  2. i love the die hard movies. they are all topical with the added benefit of explosions, cameos, and extra cheese on the side


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...